weight loss during pregnancy miscarriage | Terrible Twos

weight loss during pregnancy miscarriage

"The terrible twos are a terrible misnomer. 

They imply a finite time frame for behavior that doesnt necessarily have one."

-What to Expect: The Toddler Years, page 446

I dont know how scientific this is, but I really think it is confusing being a two-year old. I dont think they understand why they cant have their cake and eat it too. Yesterday I had a multiples playdate at my house. There were a lot of two-year olds running around and many of them were overwhelmed, including one of mine. He wanted to get down and play, but was intimidated by the noise and the amount of children suddenly appearing in "his" playroom. As I was chatting with another mom, he grabbed my legs and said, "Up! Up!" I picked him up to which he said, "Down! Down!" He wanted to play with the toys on the ground and be held by Momma. After picking him up and putting him down a few times, I told him he had to choose up or down. The poor child looked at the toy, only a few steps out of reach, and looked at his Momma; he couldnt figure out a way to do both.

The things my toddlers are interested in now are so different than the things they were interested in even weeks ago. Their vocabulary is jumping by leaps and bounds. Their dexterity is growing. They are imitating absolutely everything their older brother does (much to his dismay). They imitate everything I do. I catch them feeding the dog-- many times a day-- just because they saw me do it. They want to help with everything and they dont want me to help them do it.

It has to be hard to take so much in. It has to be confusing to suddenly become more aware of the world around you. My last blog post mentioned how I feel about parenting this time around compared to how I felt the first time around (read, "First time mom"). I knew my oldest was hitting age appropriate behaviors, but I felt that he knew better. With C and O, I much more feel they need to be guided towards the appropriate behavior instead of strictly expecting the appropriate behavior. For instance, at two-years old, I would tell my oldest, "You need to sit." He would stand or crouch at the correct spot, say, a park bench, yet I said "sit" so I expected him to sit on his bottom where I told him to. With C and O, not only would it be tiring to enforce that level of obedience as a mother of three children, but they are two! How can I expect a two-year old to sit on the park bench while the other kids are running around with balls, trucks, bubbles, and the like? I expect them to stay near me, standing or sitting. I try to give commands that I know are in the realm of things they can follow.

In many ways, it reminds me of our puppy training classes we took with our dog Louis. The trainer told us to keep him in the "wait" position just past what we knew he could do. If he could sit and wait for 5 whole seconds, keep him in wait for 6 seconds and keep building on it. Our four-year old is capable of sitting on the park bench and waiting until he can go play, but our two-year olds will struggle with it (though our four-year old will struggle with sitting on the park bench if he sees both his brothers are allowed to stand in front of it). I feel like now I try to put them in situations that I know they can do, build on the skills they have.

Their personalities are all so different. Our oldest is a stubborn child, much like his father and mother. One of our toddlers reminds me a lot of him, though D is much more interested in having our approval and attention. C is much more about doing what makes him happy, regardless of how we feel about it. On one hand, that is a good thing (we dont end up in near so many Battle of the Wills) and on the other it is not (if he wants to do something, he wont be happy until hes done it). O is much more happy-go-lucky and mellow. I call him my bohemian baby because he just wants to kick his shoes off and play with his toys. While C is following D around and trying to play with him, O is crawling into my lap with a book. The "Terrible Twos," as they are called, have played out differently with all of them. While D was a breathholder from 6 weeks to 3-years old, weve only had two breathholding episodes from C and none from O.

I think they get called the Terrible Twos for a number of reasons. They come out of nowhere. One week you are loving how excited your toddler is about life and learning new things and the next week you are staring at a writhing, red-faced toddler on the floor of Target wondering where this new behavior has come from. The Terrible Twos also come with a surge of independence. Things that never were a problem before suddenly become knock down drag-out, all-in battles. Transitioning from activity to activity becomes challenging. He wants to be out of his room, but he doesnt want you to lift him over the gate or open the gate or help him in any way. He doesnt want you to brush his teeth or take off his shirt. You want to allow some independence, yet it is hard when they wont allow you to help at all, whatsoever, dont even look at them with a helpful look on your face.

I gave the toddlers ice cream cones the other day. It started melting down their hands, which was very upsetting. Neither toddler could eat another bite until their hands were properly cleaned. They wouldnt let me wipe their hands. They wouldnt hand me their cones so they could wipe their own hands. They wouldnt use their free hand to wipe the dirty hand. We were stuck. It ended up being that I wiped their hands quickly while they flailed in anger, making more of an ice cream mess, upsetting them more, because now instead of some ice cream melting onto their hands, they had ice cream drips on their pants and shirts. By the end of it, I wanted to just throw the ice cream cones away and forget about the whole thing. It was exhausting.

Today we went to the movies. One of the toddlers did pretty well, as I thought he would. The other did horrible. He wanted to grab the seat in front of him. He wanted to drag his blanket in the bucket of popcorn and rip the lids off cups. He didnt want to sit in his seat, or my lap, or stand quietly in the row. He stood and whined and moaned. I tried ignoring him, hoping he would stop, but no. He moaned, like Harry did in When Harry Met Sally. I didnt want to leave my husband with one toddler and our preschooler, in case the toddler cried that I left the theater or acted out later, causing our preschooler to miss the movie. So I took both toddlers out of the theater. The toddler who was behaving well in the theater thought it was fun walking down the stairs with Mommy and fun walking into the lobby with Mommy. The other toddler didnt really know what was going on until we started walking outside toward the car and he lost it. He threw himself on the ground screaming, "Movie! Movie!" He wouldnt use his legs. He kicked and screamed. I tried picking him up and he flailed so hard I thought I would drop him. Im standing on the curb of the movie theater with one toddler holding on to the Hold-On Handle and the other toddler face down on the concrete, my purse stuffed full of diapers and wipes and a tote bag full of their lovies, wondering how on earth I was going to make it to the car.

Its a phase. I know it is a phase. In a recent blog post about toddler twins ("Keep calm and carry on"), I mentioned a woman who was a bit of a Debbie Downer to me about whether it gets easier or harder. I made the point that I dont think it gets easier; it just gets better. My oldest had temper tantrums like this until he was three-years old and then they morphed into a whole new beast: The Three-Year Old. I dont know, maybe three-years old will be easier with these guys. They have different personalities; they have someone to play with whereas my oldest had to entertain himself a lot more. We are hitting another phase with our four-year old as we are dealing with the Terrible Twos. School has let out for the summer and I think it has sunk in that he wont be seeing his preschool teachers again or going back to school with his classmates. It breaks my heart thinking of how much he loved that school and misses being there.

Ive decided Motherhood moves in waves. Some waves you can ride to shore, some throw you under, and some you have to dive through. Were trying to dive through this wave right now. We know it is a big wave, a hard wave that will beat us into the seabed if we let it carry us. We know this isnt the only wave and that there will be more waves someday in the future, bigger waves that are even harder to handle than this one. Just like when you are at the beach, we are taking one wave at a time-- focusing on making it through this one. Some people just want to survive each wave. We want to survive the wave with style. My oldest loves watching surfing. I was thinking last night about this and how when these waves start hitting us, I need to channel my inner surfer, like a surf competition. I Googled "vintage surfing images" and came across this one at Surf for Sanitys blog:

Image courtesy of Surf for Sanity at "Vintage Surfing Book Review-- Jim Heimann"

That picture is so corny; I love it. I want to take all this busyness and turn it into something positive. I want to ride the waves with style. What to Expect: The Toddler Years by Heidi Murkoff, Arlene Eisenberg, Sandee Hathaway, B.S.N., and Sharon Mazel says on page 45 in the revised and updated 2nd edition regarding "Toddler Negativism:"

Your toddlers negative behavior is not a reflection on you (as a parent) or your child (as a person). All children, usually beginning early in the second year (and occasionally even earlier), go through a negative phase. In some children, its short-lived and half-hearted; in others, petulance is more persistent. Either way, a toddler cant control his compulsion to resist authority any more than he can control teething or growing. His testing of your authority is healthy and normal, a vital form of self-expression, an essential part of ego building, an important step on the road of personhood.

The next paragraph on the subject in What to Expect: The Toddler Years begins with this cheery sentiment, "Knowing that a toddlers negative behavior is healthy and normal, however, doesnt necessarily make it easier to live with." No kidding! Here is a picture of Goofy eating it on a wave; I dont want this to be me (though this is what Ive felt like all week!):

Image courtesy of Pin Pics, pin 9019

Ive also found a lot of comfort talking to other moms who have "been there" or are going through it as well. It is nice to hear about things that help ease the toddlers frustration (consistency and routine) and ways to ease your frustration (baby-sitter and Sam Adams Summer Ale). Ive really started participating a lot more in my local twin mom group just to hear what other moms are doing with their toddlers to get through this phase.

Double Trouble? I posted a blog post recently called "Comments" about things people say to me when I go out with twins. I really do believe in the "give peace a chance" and "live and let live" vibe I put out in that blog post. I posted a blog awhile ago called "We are moms" with the intention of bringing twin moms and singleton moms a little closer together. We all say the wrong thing sometimes. We are all going through this. I love talking about my kids and we are trying to raise polite, well-mannered boys.

Ready for the however? Since weve been going out with our "Terrible Twos Double Trouble," as Ive heard so often lately, Ive been getting a lot of the wrong kind of attention. This afternoon when we were leaving the movie theater, I was struggling to get my two toddlers to the car as one of them was throwing an epic meltdown. While the other was staying close, I still had to keep an eye on him to make sure he held on to the Hold-On Handle as we slowly made our way through the bustling parking lot. Four adults stood within arms length of me and started asking me questions about my twins as we did this. "Oh, twins? How old are they? My sisters son has twins..." I was literally dragging one of my two-year olds along by the back of his sweatshirt. I really, really,really wanted to tell them that if they had any twin questions for me, I would be happy to answer them as they helped carry my bags to the mini van three spots up.

And that outing I mentioned in "Keep calm and carry on?" There was a restaurant full of people at Chick-Fil-A watching this happen and no one held the door for us as we left. No one offered to carry anything to car for me. And several people said, "Oh, twins? I dont know how you do it! My goodness!"

I found the patience when it was two babies that I could control, even if crying in a stroller, but when Im struggling to control my twin toddlers who are having meltdowns, that is not the time to tell me about how you once thought you were going to have twins because your cousins brothers wife did.

I think moms of singletons also hear a lot of comments when going out with their little ones. I heard a lot of random, bizarre, and poorly timed comments going out when I just had D. As I said, he was a breathholder. When he would throw a tantrum in public, people would either avoid me, look at me in a way that read "That will never be my child," or give me unsolicited and sometimes rude advice, "Back in my day..."

Here is a made up conversation that Ive never had while out with one two-year old throwing a temper tantrum:

Stranger: "Single trouble?"

Me: "Yeah... Bud, you have to walk. Right now. One... two..."

Stranger: "My nieces husbands sister has a little boy."

Me: "Oh, really? Thats wonderful. Bud, I mean it, you have to walk."

Stranger: "Yeah. How old is he?"

Me: "Um, hes two. Bud. Use. Your. Legs."

Stranger: "Wow. Two-years old. You have your hands full."

Me: "Yes. Bud, if you dont listen, we will have to leave."

Stranger: "I cant imagine having one. I mean, seriously. How do you keep up with him?"

Me: "Allright, we have to go bye-bye. We do not throw ourselves on the ground and scream."

Stranger: "Wow! How do you keep up with him?"

Me: "Its busy. But I have to go. I think its time for nap. Come on, bud."

Stranger: "[Hollering to spouse] Honey, you have to come look at this! She has a two-year old boy with her."

Me: "Bud, I gave you a warning. Stop throwing. One... two..."

Strangers spouse: "Omigoodness!  A two-year old! Did my wife tell you that my nieces husbands cousin has a little boy?"

Stranger: "I thought it was your nieces husbands sister?"

Strangers spouse: "No, Im certain its his cousin."

Me: "Im sorry, but I have to go. You have a nice day! Bud, we dont throw."

Stranger: "Can we take a picture of your two-year old?"

Me: [Looking at my red-faced, screaming two-year old kicking his legs while throwing french fries out of the stroller seat I just stuffed him into] "Umm, I would prefer not. Come on, bud. We are going."

Stranger: "Okay, just one. Real quick. Honey, where is the camera?"

Me: "Im sorry. Im leaving. Have a good day." [walk away]

Stranger: [to spouse] "Can you imagine having a two-year old boy?"

[Both strangers watch as I struggle to open door while pushing a stroller and shake their heads in disbelief that I have a two-year old.]


Heres to channeling your inner surfer! :)

Image courtesy of Celadon in "Happy Birthday USA"

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is weight loss healthy during pregnancy | Toddler beds and baby gates

is weight loss healthy during pregnancy

C holding sleeping Os hand saying, "Brother night-night!"

We just transitioned our 26-month old twins to toddler beds.

I posted a blog about the first time our twin toddlers slept in a real bed, which happened to be on a family vacation (read "Impossible"). They had actually been climbing out of PacknPlays long before that. Before they were just climbing in and out of each others PacknPlays during our visits to my parents house. The room they sleep in there has circular door knobs, not handles like where we stayed on vacation, and they didnt realize they could escape. I would just overly baby proof the room they slept in at my parents house and pray that they didnt apply this behavior once we got home to their cribs.

When we got home from our family vacation, they did make the connection that since they could climb in and out of their PacknPlays, they could climb in and out of their cribs. We had seen them try this before and we would sternly say, "No! We do not climb." This worked when they were little toddlers; as big, bad two-year olds they said, "Danger? I laugh in the face of danger-- ha, ha, ha, ha!" We knew they were climbing out of their cribs because not only would we find them in each others cribs in the morning, but we would also hear the loud THUMP! followed by the loud cry, "Mooooooomma!" We ignored it. "Climbing out of their cribs? No... they only do it occasionally. They will learn to stop," we said. Shocked we were every time we found them out of their own cribs when we walked into their room in the morning or after nap, though we found them that way every time we walked in their room. Complete and utter denial.

And then we found them "planking" on the side of their cribs. Specifically, we found O planking on the side of his and Cs crib, like a baby bridge. We could deny it no longer. This was indeed a problem.

With a heavy heart, we converted their cribs to toddler beds. They had their little Fisher Price baby tools in their bedroom helping me unscrew the sides. They helped put the screws in Ziploc bags so we wouldnt lose them. They helped make the beds and tuck their baby dolls in the bed, "See? Baby sleeps in a toddler bed. Baby doesnt climb out of bed. Baby likes staying in bed all night long and taking naps in his own bed, like is Momma tells him to. Good baby..."

While Baby may like staying in his toddler bed, C and O most definitely do not.

C sleeping behind the door in his room

It took our oldest about a week to figure out that he didnt have to stay in bed. Of course, he was about a year and a half old and thus much more obedient; our toddlers are just over two and like testing boundaries much more. However, our oldest didnt share a room with a twin brother and they are. I think it is much more tempting to crawl out of bed to see what your brother is doing when you have the freedom to do so. They crawled out of bed immediately the first night. We firmly told them, "No," and put them back to bed. I did stand outside their door and put them back to bed every time I heard them get up, regardless of how quiet they were being. I dont know if it was the sleep training-- they go to bed every night at 8 pm-- or my consistency, but they havent had too much issues with bedtime.

We did have problems with one of the toddlers waking up in the middle of the night for about the first week of toddler beds. C would wake up around midnight screaming bloody murder. Im not sure what would wake him up. The first couple nights he pointed to where the crib rail was as if he was upset it was gone. The next night or so I think he just got into the habit of waking up and having Momma tuck him back in. Realizing this, I told him, "Momma is going to tuck you in now. Im not coming back in. You need to go to bed." I gave him a kiss and let him cry. It made me sad because we havent really made them cry it out (we did 12 Hours in 12 Weeks Old: A Step-by-Step Plan for Baby Sleep Success by Suzy Giordano) and I didnt want him feeling like, "Oh, great. I dont want to be in a toddler bed and now Mommy and Daddy are abandoning me." It took him two or three nights and then the middle of the night hour long scream fest stopped. I would just go in the first time, tell him good-night and I wasnt coming back in, tuck him into bed, and then let him cry.

Before toddler beds, I was chaffing under our nap schedule. C would nap-- seriously-- from about 12 pm to 4:30 pm. If I put him down at 1 pm, he would get up around 5:30 pm, sometimes later. I was trying to push our afternoon nap back to around 2 pm so he wouldnt sleep so long (though he was then just napping from 2 pm to 6 pm or later). I felt like I was stuck at home all afternoon for him to nap between 4 and 5 hours; I wanted freedom. Oh, foolish thoughts.

After toddler beds, I wish I was stuck at home all afternoon due to a long nap. Naps evaporated-- poof! C really needs his nap. O would take a nap before the transition, anywhere between 45 minutes to 3 hours, usually at least an hour. He had some fussy afternoons after toddler beds, but C really took the cake for fussy. We are talking about full-on, clinging, screaming, flailing, breathholding temper tantrums. Over everything. E.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. From the time he woke up in the morning to the time he went to bed. And because he was in a toddler bed, he would flail out of his bed and run to the bedroom door as soon as I laid him down; the convenient containment of a crib was gone. When he was in a crib and really needed a nap, I could lay him down, listen to him cry for a couple minutes, peek my head in, and see him sleeping soundly with his blanket shoved up his nose. Now we have this endless battle. Go in, lay him down, he screams, runs to the door, climbs over the gate, I go in, lay him down, he screams, runs to the door, climbs over the gate... Get the picture?

Oh, yes, and his twin brother then decides to join in. O may not need a nap as badly, but he is still more tired than usual. He hasnt had any down time-- a crib is great for providing a little quiet play in a familiar, safe environment-- and he wants Momma. Now. So I have O screaming at the gate down the hall for me, C screaming at the gate in his bedroom, and our oldest feeling very tired of the crying. And not only was our oldest D tired of the crying, but my husband and I were. It was a tense time for all of us, (read "Marriage").

My two other blog posts on this topic, "Keep calm and carry on" and "First time mom," help capture the essence of how crazy it has been around here. Our whole groove was thrown off. I was accustomed to having a four hour block of relative peace in the afternoon. Our preschooler was used to having some one-on-one time with Momma every afternoon, reading stories and doing a special project (usually just drawing pictures together). Laundry backed up, cooking "fancy" dinners stopped, and I felt like we were thrown into survival mode. We really were thrown off our groove.

I reached out to other moms about how they transitioned to toddler beds. I heard a lot of people say they separated their twins at naptime once they transitioned to toddler beds. This option doesnt work well for us as they cant nap in their older brothers room and our bedroom isnt exactly baby proof (it has become the catch-all of all non-baby proof things in our house-- our dressers are piled with things we dont want the babies getting their hands on). I also heard several moms say they sat in their childrens room during naptime and bedtime to make sure they went to sleep.

My hubby and I talked. How do we want to enforce bedtime and naptime? I know I dont want to sit in their room for even 10 minutes every single night when we put them to bed, or for however long it takes them to nap every afternoon. We decided on a zero tolerance policy at bedtime. If we hear them making any noise at bedtime, we go in and put them down. This has actually worked. Theyve been in their toddler beds for-- what?-- three weeks now?-- and they go to bed without problems. Naptime is a different story. We decided that we would do a quiet time policy: if they are quiet, fine. Dont care if you are napping or playing quietly, you are staying in your room until I come get you. I really think we will switch to the zero tolerance policy for naptime as well; they just arent going down for nap well.

Remember my blog post on the weird showering dilemma I had (read, "Showering")? Now I have nowhere to leave the toddlers while I shower. My boys have figured out that if you can climb out of a PacknPlay, you can climb out of your crib and if you can climb out of your crib, you can climb over a baby gate. I put them in their room and they climb over the baby gate. I put them in the playroom and they climb over the baby gate. There are only so many child-proof places that I can leave them for me to shower while they are awake. Ive taken to showering at night after they go to bed or in the morning before my hubby leaves.

This morning was different in that I had plans with the kids and needed to shower. Hubby left early and so I was left with two toddlers and preschooler to entertain while I showered. I decided to set the preschooler up in the family room with Magic School Bus and his writing notebook to copy words down. For the toddlers, I put the gate up in the playroom and told them to play while Momma took a quick shower. I think they thought I was leaving because they flipped out. I comforted them, assured them I wasnt leaving, and then brought them down the hall to their bedroom so they could see and hear me while I showered. I put them in their room with the gate up, went to turn on Magic School Bus for D, and when I came back down the hall I found two naked toddlers dashing around their bedroom. I didnt want to leave them naked as they are nowhere near potty trained and so I got new diapers, explained they need to leave their clothes on, and then got them dressed. This distressed O greatly. He screamed, "Naked! Naked! Naked!" as he pulled on his shirt. He then had an epic meltdown from which I could not recover him from. Forty-five minutes later my hubby comes home as Im trying to get C to play in the playroom while I attempt to get a screaming O to nap in his bedroom. D is now on his third or fourth episode of Magic School Bus. Hubby comes in, takes O from me, and tells me, "Ive got this. Go shower." I took a ten minute shower. Ten. Minutes. That is all I needed to get clean, children. Why does it have to be so hard sometimes?

Emptying the dressers in their bedroom

Hubby went back to work after I got out of the shower. I wanted to blow dry my hair and throw on some make up, another 10-15 minute process if Im hurrying. Didnt happen. I did some more back and forth between the playroom and the bedroom. The toddlers escaped from the playroom and tore apart the kitchen. They were having so many meltdowns and being so impossible to control that I said, "Okay! Early naptime!" I put them down for nap. They refused to stay in bed and climbed over the gate. I put them down. Again and again and again. Until finally they fell asleep. I dont know why they caved and fell asleep, but they did. This is when I decided that Momma needed a writing break and so I sat down to write this blog post. Over an hour later, I hear O yelling at the door, "Momma! Momma!" I worried that he would wake C up so I went down the hall, cracked open the door, and just stared at what I saw. C is sleeping behind the door (fully dressed with his blanket). O was standing butt naked in the middle of a disaster zone. Every drawer is emptied, the contents scattered all over the floor and piled on the chair. They pulled everything off their beds. The toy bin is upside down. Holy smokes. I lifted the naked O over the gate, closed the door, and brought him out here with me. He is now sitting at the table eating a peanut butter sandwich wearing only a diaper, big smile plastered on his face.

Not every day has gone like this since we transitioned to toddler beds. Many have though, which is why we have all been a little stressed. To get them into a routine, we stayed home for about a week and figured out a new nap schedule. This put us on the worlds worst nap schedule. As my husband wisely said, "At least they are on a nap schedule." C would go down for a nap around 10:30/11:00 am and nap until 1:00/1:30 pm. O would go down for a nap around 1:30/2:00 pm and nap until about 3:30 pm. C would then go back down for a nap around 4:00/4:30 pm and sleep until 5:30/6:00 pm. We were home rotating naps all day. Once we got them napping, we started pushing back Cs morning nap, getting it closer to Os afternoon nap. This shortened Cs second nap. Now we try to put both toddlers down around 1:30/2:00 pm. The first day we put C down at this time, he slept for over 5 hours. I think he was exhausted from lack of sleep. Now they nap for roughly 2-3 hours, still shorter than Cs pre-toddler bed nap of 4 to 4 and a half hours, but better than no nap at all.

We have also had a difference in our wake up time. In cribs, the boys went to bed for the night at 8 pm and woke up around 7:45/8:00 am. I usually got them out of their cribs around 8:15/8:30 am. Now they are waking up anywhere between 6 am and 7 am. I am not sure why so early. I suspect that O is waking up early and getting C up. I have tried to either make them wait until 7 am before I get them or for 15 minutes. For instance, if they wake up at 6 am, I dont go get them for an hour. If they wake up at 7 am, I make them wait for 15 minutes. Im *hoping* (<--fingers crossed) that I can push their wake up time to at least 7:30 am. Im not sure if it will happen or not. Even if we cant push back the wake up time, we are not waking up any earlier than 7:00 am. Momma is not a morning person.

Both toddlers climbing over the baby gate

Besides naptime, the hardest part of this whole process has been the ineffectiveness of the baby gates, now called "baby hurdles" at our house. Our garage is a baby gate graveyard. If you are looking to buy baby gates, here is a run down on how they will do when you have toddlers:

• Summer Infant Sure and Secure Extra Tall Walk Thru Gate: we own one of these. It works fine for infants, but all toddlers have to do is shake the gate really hard and it will eventually open. The more they do this, the easier it is for it to open. This gate is much more of an alarm system, really. "Oh, hear the gate? The toddlers made it through."
• Safety 1st Perfect Fit Gate: we own... three of these? Four if you count the one we left at my parents house. We bought the first two (including the one at my parents house) when our oldest was a toddler. It is the kind with the holes in it. It looks a lot like this gate, but white. The holes make it, essentially, a baby rock climbing wall and, let me tell you, they are always up for the challenge. The next two we bought were for the twins and they are the smooth fancy looking version, like in the link. The toddlers are 26-months and just deadlift themselves over this gate. They perch themselves on the top to swing their legs over and go down the other side (see above picture). That is why we call it the baby hurdle.
• Regalo Easy Step Walk Thru Gate: we own two of these. This is the only gate they havent been able to get through when locked. You press the handle down and a tab slides over it. You have to pull the red tab back to release the handle, then pull the handle up to open the gate. The two step process is hard for their little hands. It is also pressure mounted in our doorways and they havent felt bold enough to attempt climbing this one, perhaps because of the space in the bars. Regardless, l-o-v-e this gate. Downside: we frequently trap our house guests in rooms with this gate because it is trickier to open and, if you dont lock it, they can just lift the handle and walk through. I think I say "remember to lock the gate" 800 times a day.
• Carlson Extra Wide Walk Thru Gate with Pet Door: we own one of these, made by the same people who did the Regalo gate, same wonderful latch. We havent put this one up because it is too wide for our doorways in this house. I actually got this one free! Someone put it on the side of the road with a "free" sign on it and I picked it up one day on our way home from church.

The swing gates are great if you want to leave it up long term, such as the one we keep in the hallway going down to the bedrooms. They are also easier to get through when carrying an infant (or two). The pressure gates are great for doorways you wont use often, if you want to leave it up and permanently block infants and pets from entering a room. The pressure gates are also great for when company comes over and you want to block their kids from going to certain parts of your home. Ill put them up for the afternoon if I want the kids (and their parents) to know certain areas are off limits, especially when there will be lots of kids coming over, which tends to happen when you are friends with mothers of multiples. These pressure gates, though, only slow our toddlers down from going in or out of an area; they are so easy for them to climb over. Hands down, I love the Regalo swing gate.

It has been a trying phase, most definitely. I feel like we have finally reached some sort of routine, finally caught our balance and adjusted to our new schedule. It was such a sudden shift in our daily routine. In "Terrible twos," I mention that these phases of motherhood come in waves. I dont want to jinx it, but we are figuring it out and, perhaps, getting the hang of having two two-year olds in toddler beds!

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