after pregnancy weight loss program | Googling whilst pregnant

after pregnancy weight loss program

You may remember a post I wrote about my obsession with Googling and checking parenting queries on the internet. Even when my own common sense told me the answer, I Googled away and scared myself silly with some of the rubbish that is available on the internet.  You can read about that little habit here. 

I thought my days of Googling might be reserved for when you need to know where you have seen that actor before, or more times than not, when trying to prove my husband wrong on something.  But then I have had the amazing news that I am pregnant with my second child, and it is like my Googling addiction has taken on a life of its own.  

I always seem to just want to check things.  Even things I secretly know the answer to. But the thing is with the internet, theres kind of alot of views, facts, hoaxes, utter garbage and scaremongering to wade through or you will will become too horrified to continue on your search. Its also readily available, at home, at the park, in the restaurant, and my fingers just seem to be itching to hit that search button. 

A recent Google search I did was can you eat cheesecake when pregnant?. This was after I had eaten one that was half of the size of my daughters head. The only consensus appears to be that you need to find yourself a micro-biologist to come and test the food for you before you eat it for a definitive answer.  In fact, you should apply this micro-biologist answer to any food related questions including cheeses, eggs, mayonnaise and ice cream.  

I then went and reversed my car into the garage last week.  I had my seat belt on and slightly jolted forward.  I couldnt have been doing more that 3 miles per hour and there was no damage to the car or garage wall. However, off I toddled to Google reversing into a wall whilst pregnant. To my disappointment nobody appeared to have wrote about this EXACT situation on the internet.  What I did find was horrifying stories of car collisions and placenta abruptions.   I telephoned my second Google advisor, my mum, who basically told me to get a hold of myself and go and have a cup of tea. Thanks mum. 

My advice for the whole of pregnancy? Go with your gut instinct.  Failing that, go and ask your mum.  Do not Google, because there will be some woman from Timbucktoo who ate a cheesecake and gave birth to a goat.  You have been warned.  Relax and enjoy your pregnancy. Though if you do need a telephone number for a microbiologist I can hook you up. :-)

Thanks for reading and I would love to hear any Google pregnancy related stories!!!

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weight loss during pregnancy pictures | One of those phases

weight loss during pregnancy pictures

I sat down this morning to write a blog post on our family schedule and why routines work well for us. However, as I was typing our toddlers kept interrupting me with issue after issue.

Whining.

Whining.

Whining.

I eventually felt myself getting more and more frustrated, losing my train of thought and writing long, rambling paragraphs that lead nowhere. I saved the blog post and closed the browser.

I tried switching gears. I reached out to a fellow momma and shared my frustrations, got some support; even texting someone can help get some encouragement. I switched activities. Obviously blogging wasnt going to happen; lets color! Lets start school earlier than usual. Lets do something organized together.

I called our kindergartner back inside to do some school. He got out his school supplies. One of our toddlers started whining, unprovoked. Literally standing in the middle of the room making high-pitched whiny, screeching noises over and over again. I gave him a warning. I invited him to sit with us and to color. He persisted. I walked him to his room and told him whining was unacceptable. He started screaming and hitting the door when I closed it. I took a deep breath and prayed, "God, let me love my kids through you. Let me show them your love."

I went back to the table with the other 2 boys, a toddler and our kindergartner. We said the Pledge of Allegiance. We prayed together. I went back to get the toddler in quiet time and asked if he wanted to join us. He declined and said he was sorry for whining and that he wanted to play in the playroom. He started getting dressed in costumes. I resumed school with the other 2 boys. The toddler at the table finished coloring and said he wanted to do costumes; he cleaned up his markers and went to the playroom. Moments later the first toddler came out of the playroom whining, whining, whining. I instructed him to use his words. He was frustrated; his backpack was broken. I informed him it was upside down and that is why everything was falling out. I offered to help him. He backed away whining. He let out the high pitch screeching whine over and over and so I walked him to his room to collect himself. He whined and whined at the door. I prayed. I went back to school with the other 2. I came back awhile later to ask if he wanted to come out of his room and he threw a toy at the door. I tucked him in for a nap and told him he needed to rest. I came back to do the calendar with the other 2 boys. It went well. We did our thing and then the other toddler started whining-- expressionless, unprovoked whining. Why? I didnt know so I asked him to do his calendar job. He stood motionless whining. I gave him a warning. He whined. I escorted him to his room to rest as well.

I stood outside their door and felt the tears well up in my eyes. What am I doing wrong? Why are they constantly whining and fighting?

Yesterday we had a list of errands to run. On the actual errands, they were obedient and well behaved. They stood in line with me at the Post Office. They waited in the returns line at Costco. But as soon as we got in the car it was constant bickering-- constant bickering. Wild slapping in the direction of their brother, screeching at the top of their lungs, "NO!", yelling, whining, throwing, flailing, moaning...

Im exhausted. This behavior has been going on for over a week. Throw in there some potty training regression and the constant whining and bickering has just about drained me. I put them down to nap and they spend the entire time opening their respective doors bumming, "Can I come out now?" I wake up in the morning to the sounds of the toddlers fussing and fighting and whining and arguing in the hall bathroom. I put them to bed after listening to them fuss and fight and whine and argue all.day.long.

I go through moments where I feel confident and think, "This is a phase. I understand it is a phase. I understand that parenting is hard and that some phases are more enjoyable than other phases. I know their brains are developing. I know they have dealt with big changes from their dad starting prototype and being gone all day. I know we will come out of this okay and to focus on the positives."

And then there are other moments where I cringe at the thought of riding in the car with them and so I dont want to leave the house.

Where I think about how quickly they grow up and how one day they wont be 3-years old anymore, they will be 6-years old and I will wonder where the time went.

Where I hear other moms talk about how the toddler years are their favorite.

Where Im crying in the laundry room and texting my mom because I just dont know what else to do and I feel so alone.

Where I miss our old duty station because I had friends who were going through the same thing with me, who have kids the same age as mine, who invited us over for playdates and park dates and coffee dates.

Where I just hate spending all day long listening to them fight with each other.

Those moments I feel like a horrible parent.

I dont know why our toddlers are behaving this way. I spend a lot of time praying and asking God to extend some grace their way, to blanket me in his love so that I can show them his love, to strengthen me so that I have the energy and patience to be consistent. I read parenting books (my favorites: Keep Calm and Parent On and When Mothers Pray). I meditate on Philippians, my favorite book of the Bible. I hold on to those sweet moments with them in between the fussing and the fits. Yet I struggle because the absolute truth is that I am not enjoying myself.

Since I do not have a large friend base here, Ive been working on keeping myself busy. Ive been focusing a lot on things that I do enjoy doing-- kindergarten with our oldest, taking walks with our infant, reading by myself and with the kids, and cooking. Some of the cooking has been fun to do with the children, even the toddlers. Sometimes it goes downhill quickly and for no reason, like yesterday when one of the toddlers was helping me until he just broke down into a whining mess. Other times they get immense satisfaction from making the meal with me and will channel all their energy into the tasks I give them. I try to have them help me one at a time, stealing moments that I can give them my undivided attention and listen to what they have to say. I try to find tasks that play to their strengths so they can build their self-confidence. Ive also been trying to keep our calendar full, inviting friends on playdates, meeting up with girlfriends, doing things with my family. Having 4 children, homeschooling, and life as a Navy wife tend to keep our calendar full and so the hours of the day tend to slip by quickly anyways; I make my best effort to organize those hours in a way that works well for our boys.

This is one of those phases that I am just holding on and hoping that it passes quickly. It has been one of those phases that no matter what I try doesnt seem to make a big difference in how our day goes or how the toddlers behave. It has been one of those phases that make me wish I lived closer to my family and to my girlfriends.

How do you deal with these kind of phases?

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after pregnancy weight loss pills | Preschool An update

after pregnancy weight loss pills

Its been quite an emotional journey with my daughter starting preschool. You can read about her amazing first day here and subsequent tears here. In those first few weeks I really questioned my decision to send her to pre-school.  Even though she was only doing 3 hours twice a week, I was really upset that she was worrying in the morning about going and she kept saying she didnt want to go.  I spoke to one of the teachers who reassured me that she settled well after I left and I should keep on encouraging her and she would get used to the routine.  

At home I kept telling my daughter how she was a big girl now and we got way too many books from the library about starting school and starting pre-school (I sometimes changed the words accordingly).  When we saw school children I told her that they all went to pre-school first and if she kept on going she would then be able to go to big school.  

And then one day it was like something just clicked.  Instead of her usual crying as soon as we got to the door, she went to get her name tag and peg it up, and then she sat on the carpet.  I saw a little tear in her eye but she did not cry.  When I picked her up that day I told her how proud I was of her and she seemed really pleased. 

And as the weeks have passed, she has grown more and more confident.  She smiles and runs into the pre-school now and whilst her little thumb goes straight into her mouth for comfort, she looks so much more relaxed. In September she will receive the governments 15 hours of pre-school sessions, so we will increase her hours. And I feel happy to do that.  

Starting pre-school is such a big step and I think I completely underestimated how long it would take for her to adjust and get used to being away from me.  I think you really need to trust the child care provider you send your child to, and give your child lots of time to adjust.  Its been just over three months since she started and I beam with pride when my daughter tells me of her new little friends or she suddenly bursts into a dance she has learnt at pre-school. I love it, and I can tell she does too.  

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weight loss during early pregnancy without morning sickness | Homeschooling 5 year old preschool

weight loss during early pregnancy without morning sickness

The year is not over yet, but I have loved homeschooling 5-year old preschool. Yesterday I worked on our curriculum for kindergarten and Im even more excited for next year. We kept D back a year (a fellow homeschooling mother of boys calls this "red shirting" and not keeping them back-- love it!). Our sons birthday is at the end of the summer so he would either be youngest or oldest kid in his class. We decided he could use another year before we started him in kindergarten. Next year we will start our first "real" year of homeschooling: kindergarten.

For us, the emphasis for preschool has been on character and community. Weve been focusing on waiting your turn and taking turns, not interrupting, helping others, thinking of others before yourself, listening and following instructions, and following the rules even without direct supervision. Most of this can be taught in everyday life, especially since he has two younger brothers. We apply these lessons as he helps cook, clean, and run errands. When there is an aspect we feel needs special attention, we take the time to teach that lesson, such as following instructions while cooking and patiently waiting for the job he has to do (not rushing through it and making mistakes).

Of course we also do school. Ive been following Ruth Beechicks method for reading and writing, The Three Rs. We do some sort of writing every day. Usually it is informal, but a couple times a week I have him copy a complete sentence. Weve been reading chapters of Who Was Martin Luther King Jr? by Bonnie Bader. After we read a chapter, I have him copy a sentence down from that chapter, a sentence of my choosing that I feel summarizes that chapter or teaches something important about Martin Luther King Jr. Often he copies words in his notebook that have something to do with that days theme or activities, like when we were working on colors with his toddler brothers, he wrote down things that were red (strawberries, apples, Clifford). Sometimes the only writing he does that day is on a treasure map he drew or a card for a friend or family member he made. We do a lot of reading as a family anyways, Look and Find books, childrens books, books on a topic that interests him. One of their favorite books is Birds of North Carolina by Tim Ohr. We bought it when we lived in North Carolina and had lots of trees and birds in our backyard. There we would sit in our sunroom and name the birds we saw. This book was a Costco find that I bought on a whim (need to get one for South Carolina now that weve moved!). We also have a large coffee table book on John Deere tractors that they love. It gives the history of John Deer and facts on each model; we read that book a lot. That book was a used book store find that cost hardly anything. Now that we are working on reading, Ive scoured the used book stores childrens section for easy readers (Curious George, Berenstain Bears, Clifford, etc). We usually work together on reading during his brothers naptime when we have uninterrupted time together. I love that time, curled up on the couch together working on reading a book (and then I love when we are done for the time being and not spending 10 minutes on one word-- haha!).

Math hasnt been difficult for us to incorporate in our homeschool. I actually bought Saxon Math K: An Incremental Development (Home Study Teachers Edition). I bought this at a homeschool consignment store in North Carolina-- best place ever! I did not buy the meeting book or the kit, which includes all the materials needed for the curriculum. I bought the materials on Amazon, like the linking cubes and such. I bought some of them before we started and some of them after we started when I realized I actually needed for the lessons. I also did not follow this book to a T. I mostly used it as a guidebook. D really likes math and it comes naturally to him. We tend to do a lot of math with him in everyday life, not just with counting bears, but with word problems and having him help solve things. For instance, "If Mommy and your brothers drive in the van and Daddy and you ride in the Jeep, how many people are in the van? How many in the Jeep? How many all together?" "I made 10 cookies and there are 3 boys to eat the cookies. How many cookies does everyone get? How many cookies are leftover?" "How many drinks do I need to buy at Chick-Fil-A so we all get a drink? If we want a milkshake after we drink our lemonades, how many drinks will I buy total?" I used the Saxon Math Teachers Edition much more as an inspiration for a more structured lesson if I need it. I do not use the calendar plan laid out in it; we have a hanging pocket calendar we use instead. We also play math guided games: Chutes and Ladders, ThinkFun Math Dice Jr, Sorry. He seriously loves math and loves when we do anything that has even the slightest mathematical slant. A favorite game of his? Measuring things in the house with a tape measure. I make it a math game. "If the chair is 20 inches across, how many inches across would it be if there were 2 more inches? How about 2 less inches?" I really did like the Saxon Math book; so much so that I bought the Level 1 Home Study Teachers Edition to use his kindergarten year-- again, just the teachers edition, not the complete kit.

There are other subjects that we do regularly. I keep track of everything in the Homeschoolers Journal. We try to remember to do our calendar everyday and we usually do. Before I got the pocket calendar, we crossed off days on a wall calendar. My neighbor and I have big plans to make an adorable felt calendar! Im very excited about that. Everyday at breakfast we read from the One Year Childrens Bible. The boys love their Bible story and pull it down while I get their breakfast plates on the table. I like how short the stories are so I can actually read to both our preschooler and our toddlers without losing their interest. We also do a Bible verse with our preschooler. I do not have him learn a verse a week, just more on his pace. He must learn it word for word, but when hes ready to learn the next part, I teach it to him. He just learned Isaiah 9:6 and now we are working on John 3:16. We also talk a lot about the Navy, since their dad is a submariner. The toddlers are very interested in submarines, ships, and boats. Our preschooler is very interested in how the submarine works. They all love that there is a submarine in Despicable Me 2.

And part of our homeschooling plan is teaching that everyone needs to help out around the house. He feeds the dog every morning and changes the dogs water. They all bring their dishes to the kitchen sink or kitchen counter (depending on the dish-- I bet they could break their Corelle bowls chucking them in the sink). They have to pick up shared living spaces throughout the day, when they change activities. I do not require either the toddlers or our preschooler to move all the toys from the family room to where it necessarily goes in the playroom, unless Im having our preschooler pick up toys that he got out and a mess he made (like his puzzles or his craft stuff). That is too much of a task for the toddlers to grasp (keep picking up toys in the family room and put them away where they go-- they get distracted). After they bring the toys to the playroom, I sit in there and help put them away or direct where they go. They all help with housecleaning, tidying shared spaces, dusting, sweeping, wiping down counters. This Rubbermaid Dual Action Microfiber Flip Mop has made it so easy for our preschooler to help with the floors. The toddlers dust with dusting cloths and they help clean either with paper towels or rags sprayed with vinegar water. They all help fold laundry. Surprisingly, they actually can all help, not the kind of help children often give that is in no way helpful. The toddlers can fold rags, towels, and pillow cases quite well. Their shirts and things are often folded by them in interesting and unique ways, but when they get a bee in their bonnet to fold a load of laundry, who am I to stop them? Our preschooler can fold just about anything; he gets frustrated when I drop a big load of laundry in front of him and will hum and haw. Once he gets going he is fine. The smaller loads he handles with no complaint. I really, really, really make an effort not to complain about house chores in front of them. They do, after all, have to get done one way or another, so it might as well be cheerfully. I have Philippians 2:14 hanging in their playroom, "Do everything without grumbling or arguing."

As for socializing... We do lots of playdates and activities, some structured (held a paper airplane contest), some not (park picnics or childrens museum trips). There are neighborhood kids to play with at home and homeschooling families that weve really been connecting with since weve moved here. And we are looking into our homeschooling co-op options for next year, joining one of those in the next couple weeks. Hes part of organized sports and, most recently, a preschool piano class. The best thing about homeschooling preschool is that our schedule is open and we are available for playdates and get-togethers that are held during the day. Ive been really excited looking at the co-op options for next year and the homeschool families weve connected with. The other thing Im really excited about is that my hubbys schedule is going to a little crazy next year and homeschooling is going to give us the flexibility to spend as much time as possible with him! I know we havent started the kindergarten year yet or had baby #4 yet, but I loved homeschooling preschool this year and I think kindergarten is going to be even more fun. :)

Picture taken by A McTaggart

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weight loss during early pregnancy | Homemade household cleaners

weight loss during early pregnancy

I love vinegar water. My mom used it as a cleaner when we were growing up and so the smell brings back memories of my childhood home. Ive always kept a spray bottle of vinegar water in our home. I have used it for a bunch of small cleaning tasks, but it hasnt been until our most recent move that I have started using it for all my cleaning needs. (Probably because up until we moved to South Carolina I had a housekeeper... read "Domestic goddess"). I want to say what prompted our shift to vinegar water is how environmentally friendly it is, but thats not true. What prompted the switch is how easy it is to make and how inexpensive it is.

What kind of cleaning products did I used to use? I used to use the Swiffer Wet Jet, but you have to buy the Swiffer Wet Jet Cleaner Refills and the Swiffer Wet Jet Spray Mop Cleaner Pad Refills, not to mention have the Swiffer Wet Jet Mop. I also had the Swiffer Dust Mop (needs the Swiffer Sweeper Dry Sweeping Cloths). We had the Swiffer Duster (needs the Swiffer Duster Refills) and the Clorox Toilet Wand with Storage Caddy (needs the Clorox Toilet Wand Refills). Plus we relied a lot on Clorox Disinfecting Wipes. The most offensive of all these cleaners (save for the waste from all these other cleaners) was my Clorox Bleach. We had these cleaners as well: Clorox Anywhere Hard Surface Cleaner, Soft Scrub, and Windex.

When we moved to South Carolina and I started doing all our house cleaning, I couldnt believe how much waste was leaving our house each week. I switched from all the Swiffer products to the O Cedar ProMist System, using vinegar water as the cleaning solution. I also bought the O Cedar Dual Action Dust Mop. I bought these at Target and picked up a couple extra cleaning cloths for them at the same time-- no throwing out, just wash and reuse. I switched from all the other cleaners to Method cleaners.

I still felt like I had a lot of waste and chemicals. Our toddlers are at the age where they want to "help" with everything and imitate everything they see Momma doing. Childproof locks and off-limit areas dont always prevent them from finding cleaners that should be well out of their reach. So I threw out almost all our harsh chemicals and switched almost exclusively to vinegar water. I kept some Method cleaners and put them in a box up on a high shelf in our laundry room. But there were cleaners I just couldnt bear to part with: our Clorox Toilet Wands and my Clorox Bleach.

Switching to vinegar water prompted a huge shift in our thinking. I buy a ginormous jug of distilled vinegar and mix this with water in a spray bottle. I use the vinegar water to clean our bathrooms (including the shower and outside of the toilet), the kitchen, our floors, our highchairs, and for detailing our vehicle (car seat buckles, car toys, center consoles, cup holders-- not the leather or our WeatherTech Floor Mats). I even use it as a dusting solution: spray a little on a dust cloth and send my toddlers to work dusting our house. I love that I can leave this cleaner under our kitchen sink and bathroom sinks with no worries. Not that I want our toddlers wandering around our house spraying everything down with vinegar water, but it cant hurt them! Even better, I never run out. Spray bottle empty? Grab one of my giant jugs of vinegar and fill it up right then and there. I love that convenience. No more shopping lists with dust mop refills, Clorox Wipes, on and on and on. No more gearing myself up for a cleaning day only to find out that I am out of bathroom cleaner.

(Dont care for the scent of vinegar? Try My Merry Messy Lifes recipe for Homemade Citrus-Infused Vinegar.)

I started thinking about how wonderful it would be for all our household cleaners to be this convenient. What if I could mix up laundry detergent whenever I ran out? What if I could make our own hand soap refills? What if whenever I ran out of something, I just needed to make a quick trip to our laundry room to whip up a new batch? Also, what if all these cleaners were environmentally friendly and non-toxic? What if I started saving money doing all this? I spent a lot of time Googling. I didnt want to switch from my beloved Tide Pods to something equally as horrible for the environment and my kids (OxiClean). I wanted to find ingredients I could use across the board for my cleaners.

Then I stumbled across my new favorite blog: "My Merry Messy Life," specifically her Green and Natural Cleaning Recipes and Buying Guide. Yesterday my husband and I started buying our materials for making our own household cleaners.

Whole Foods
Dr. Bronners Organic Castile Soap Citrus Orange, 32 oz. $15.99
Dr. Bronners Organic Castile Soap Lavender, 32 oz. $15.99
Dr. Bronners Organic Castile Soap Peppermint, 32 oz. $9.99 (on sale)
Now Essential Oils Lemongrass, 1 oz. $6.99
Now Essential Oils Lavender, 1 oz. $11.99

Total: $63.95

Ace Hardware

Arm and Hammer Super Washing Soda, 55 oz. $4.29

20 Mule Team Borax, 76 oz. $5.49

Total: $9.78

Target

(3) 1 Gallon Rubbermaid MixerMate Pitchers, $3.99 each

Total: $11.97

Amazon

3-pack of 24 oz. spray bottles $8.26

Now Essential Oils Tea Tree Oil, 4 oz. $18.00
Toilet brush with holder $12.00
Glycerin Vegetable Kosher, 32 oz. $13.47
Total: $59.72

Costco
Hydrogen Peroxide, 64 oz. $1.99

Grand Total: $215.68

Lowes does not carry Super Washing Soda or Borax, but the gal at Whole Foods recommended we try Ace Hardware (where she said they for sure carried it) or Wal Mart (where she thought they might carry it). We went with Ace Hardware where we could for sure buy it. We then went to Target; they carried Borax for about $1.50 less than Ace Hardware but didnt have Super Washing Soda. My husband feels Wal Mart probably carries both for less. Also, some of the ingredients that we bought in store are less expensive on Amazon. We wanted to make everything today, so we went with the in-store option, but next time I buy I will make sure to go with the less expensive option. The reason I bought 3 different kinds of Dr. Bronners Organic Castile Soap is to give myself some variety when making my various cleaners, same with the lavender and lemongrass essential oils. The tea tree oil was purchased for its antibacterial properties.

What are we making with these ingredients?

All these recipes are from My Merry Messy Life:

• Homemade Laundry Detergent
  (already made 2 gallons and am currently washing my second load of laundry in it!)
• Homemade Natural Fabric Stain Remover
• Homemade Toilet Bowler Cleaner (non-toxic)
• Homemade All Natural Foaming Hand Soap
• Homemade Dishwashing Detergent
• Homemade Moisturizing Baby Shampoo and Body Wash

I am really excited about her uses for hydrogen peroxide. I cannot wait to get rid of our bleach. And our Clorox Toilet Wands. We have already phased out our Clorox Wipes. I use a rag sprayed with vinegar water instead and havent looked back. Maybe one day I will make Homemade Reusable Disinfecting Wipes, but for now our system is working great. The only cleaner I havent been able to replace yet is Windex. The Method window cleaner is streaky-- not too bad for bathroom mirrors but horrible for the windshields in our vehicles.

My husband is super excited about the economics of switching to our own homemade cleaners. Yes, we spent all this money up front, but to make the homemade laundry detergent I used 1/2 cup of the Borax, 1/2 cup of the Super Washing Soda, 3/4 cup of the lavender Dr. Bronners Organic Castile Soap, and a little over 20 drops from the lavender essential oil. I hardly put a dent in our supplies and it made 2 gallons of laundry detergent! If you read My Merry Messy Lifes posts with the recipes, she includes the math of how much it cost her per ounce to make and how much it costs per ounce to buy the conventional products. Also, all the ingredients we bought are used in all these other recipes. While my husband keeps a close eye on the bottom line for our family budget, I focus on convenience. Being pregnant with our fourth and a stay-at-home homeschooling mom, I like when things are easy. It took roughly 10 minutes from start to finish to make the laundry detergent; how much easier can it get? I can tell you that was 100% easier than dragging all the kids to Costco! For once, my husband and I are in firm agreement on something-- homemade is the way to go for us! :)

The last point that my husband and I love about all these homemade cleaners is that they are non-toxic. While, thankfully, our children have never eaten anything life threatening, we have needed to call poison control several times in our 5-years of parenting. It is such a comfort to know that we have safe products in our home, the reason why my mom used vinegar water as my siblings and I grew up. I know that Borax raises eyebrows on the "green" blogs, but I have done some reading and for now we are using it. I like that My Messy Life includes links for more information on Borax and I also found this blog post helpful when making our decision: Crunchy Bettys post, "Getting to the Bottom of Borax: Is it Safe or Not?" Of course there is a lot you can read Googling the topic, but I found those 2 posts to be very informative.

UPDATE ON HOUSEHOLD CLEANERS:

I have been getting a lot of questions about our homemade household cleaners. Here are a few:

1. What do you do about the vinegar smell?

First of all, the vinegar smell doesnt bother me, at all. I dont really measure the vinegar and water when mixing it into a spray pump or our floor mop. For the spray mop, I do put in more vinegar than for just our everyday spray pump (read the above post to find out what I use the vinegar water to clean). I find the vinegar smell dissipates quickly and, as I said, it doesnt bother me.

If it bothers you, check out these recipes for citrus smelling vinegar: My Merry Messy Lifes Homemade Citrus Infused Vinegar or The Busy Moms Homemade All-Purpose Citrus Spray.

2. I like the idea of making my own non-toxic, biodegradable cleaners, but do they actually, you know, clean?

Short answer: yes, they do. I would suggest researching some of the properties you are unsure of, like vinegar, baking soda, super washing soda, citric acid, or borax. My Merry Messy Life has really turned me on to Dr. Bronners Organic Castile Soap. Our homemade foaming handsoap is way better than the store bought foaming handsoap refills. I have very dry skin (genetics and washing my hands all the time with potty training twins!) and the homemade foaming handsoap is so moisturizing!

3. Okay, but what about the laundry detergent? How does that clean?

My Merry Messy Lifes laundry detergent recommends 1/3 cup detergent per load. I have been using:

• a little less than 1/3 on very small loads
• 1/3 cup on small/normal loads
• a heavy 1/3 cup on normal loads
• a really heavy 1/3 cup for large/normal loads
• 2/3 cup on large loads.

When I was shopping for ingredients, the gal at Whole Foods told me that many of her homemade laundry detergents made her clothes dingy. I have had a similar experience with previously sampled homemade laundry detergents and store bought biodegradable detergents, so I upped the borax in my detergent (heavy 1/2 cup compared to the 1/2 cup called for in the recipe). Ive also been careful to separate our laundry into brights (color), whites, and darks; washing like colors together has really been working. Ive also been much more proactive about stains, rinsing them out when the boys take their clothes off to change into pajamas and not letting dirty clothes sit in the hamper. Big changes around here! Ive actually been staying on top of our laundry. ;)

As a former Tide Pod user, I have not noticed a difference between our laundry washed with Tide Pods and our laundry washed with our homemade cleaners and neither has my husband.

4. How long does it take to make your own detergent and cleaning products? I dont think I would be able to stay on top of that.

Im a homeschooling stay-at-home mother to a preschooler and toddler twins with our fourth baby on the way, not to mention a Navy wife. I thrive on convenient. The detergent seriously took 10 minutes start to finish, including set up and clean up. Making vinegar water requires popping open my jug of vinegar, pouring it into my spray bottle or floor mop, and pouring water on top. I have a funnel for making the other cleaners and all my cleaning materials are kept in the same bin in my laundry room. I grab my Pyrex mixing cup, my funnel, and whip up my next batch. Sound easy? It is. If you compare it to a shopping trip with kids, it is almost perfect (it would be even better if magic cleaning elves popped out of the homemade cleaners and did the actual cleaning!).

5. How much did all this cost?

I love that on all the homemade cleaner recipes My Merry Messy Life includes a price breakdown when comparing her formerly used store bought cleaning products with her homemade cleaning products. Check out her price breakdowns! We essentially started from scratch when we started making our own cleaning products. I had to buy a toilet brush because I didnt own one; we had always used Clorox Toilet Wands. I also bought gallon jugs to hold our detergent since we only used Tide Pods before. I think My Merry Messy Life reuses her old laundry detergent jugs. We have hardly put a dent in the supplies I listed in the above blog post.

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weight loss during pregnancy success stories | Preschool schedule

weight loss during pregnancy success stories

“Its bad enough wasting time without killing it.”
? Norton Juster, The Phantom Tollbooth ?

Preschool... wow. In all honesty, I was really looking forward to the one-on-two time with my toddlers that preschool would give me, since my four-year old would be there for half a day. Now that weve been on the "preschool schedule" for the past couple weeks, I am looking back slightly longingly at the easy-breezy summer days!

Considering driving time, I essentially have a little over two hours while our oldest is in school. So, if I run one errand and it takes me an hour and fifteen minutes--our usual Target time-- I have 45 minutes left to... do what? I cant grocery shop in 45 minutes. I cant go home and let the toddlers nap in 45 minutes. Wherever I drive to, it will take about 10 minutes to unload and 10 minutes to reload, leaving 25 minutes to do something with two toddlers. Some days I do this accelerated shopping trip where I give myself 45 minutes in this store and 45 minutes in that store (these stops are usually for one thing, like PetsMart for dog food or Target for diapers); other days we slowly meander through whatever errand we are running that day to take up the entire 2 hours. The other day at the mall, I let both the toddlers walk. A man came up to me and grumbled, "This is ridiculous! It will take you hours to shop at this pace! Put those boys in the stroller!" First of all, Im not too sure why it bothered him so much that the boys were toddling along behind me (they were actually being surprisingly well-behaved). Second of all, that was kind of the point. The biggest problem with this awkward amount of time is that I end up sitting outside of the preschool long enough for the toddlers to take a 20- to sometimes 40- minute nap, with driving and wait time.

If you arent reading Honest Toddler, you really need to be. He opens up about "The Truth About Car Sleep" and now I finally understand why a 40-minute nap in the car means no 3-hour nap at home.?

Along the lines of "Car Sleep," having a set schedule also keeps my days flying by. We wake up, do our morning routine, spend the 2+ hours D is in preschool doing something, pick D up from preschool, go home to finish lunch, lay the toddlers down for their 3 to 3 and a half hour nap (oh, that part is deliciously sweet), then its time to make dinner and start our evening routine! Throw in evening plans two nights a week and suddenly its Thursday night and I thought it was still Tuesday! Where does the time go?

And our morning routine is horribly flawed, Ive come to realize. Im still not exactly sure how to get three kids out the door in a way that works for everyone. Either they are puffy-faced from crying or I look like I just rose from the dead. This morning was a little of both. The toddlers spent the morning stealing each others toys; the preschooler spent the morning following me around while not following directions; the dog was all over the place (I think he wanted to ride with us?). In the end, I had enough time to dab concealer under my eyes and brush my teeth and the toddlers had enough time to somehow work a fat lip in there. Im feeling like I am probably going to have to start setting an alarm and getting myself ready before all the kids wake up, instead of doing it after I get all of them dressed as I have been doing.

Perhaps Ive just come to realize that childrens school schedules are intense, even just with drop-off and pick-up. Perhaps I really can figure out a way to get us all happily out the door in the morning. Perhaps it really isnt as stressful as I think it is and Im really just stressed about my husbands crazy-busy senior year schedule (our third and final year of STA-21). Perhaps I just need a weekend away with good friends and good wine... Okay, I would even take just good friends and decent wine at this point. Whatever the reason, I need to find my stride. I feel like Im living in fast-forward!

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weight loss during pregnancy 2nd trimester | Power school

weight loss during pregnancy 2nd trimester

 

Now that my husband has completed power school, I have been wanting to write a blog post on the experience from my perspective. I have found that the blog "(Very) Unofficial Submarine Officer Pipeline Rundown" has been useful during our trek through the pipeline.

My husband went through power school and prototype when he first joined the Navy, before I met him. This was his second time going through power school, last time enlisted, this time officer. I think he had an idea of what to expect from power school, but I had no idea... The blog post "Navy Nuclear Power School Rundown" helped some and from conversations with my husband I knew there would be long hours studying. However, living something is very different than hearing about it.

So what can you expect from power school?

First of all, there are some long, long, long, long hours. Long hours with no cell phones since they cannot bring their cell phones into the school house. If you have to get a hold of him, you call the duty phone and, if it is after school hours, you better know where he studies or they may or may not find him for you in a timely manner.

The other hard thing is that the school hours are not actually very long. Some days start earlier, like the PT days, but for the most part the school hours were fairly reasonable, like 7 am to 3:30 pm/4:30 pm. What makes the day so long is all the study hours. Some guys are required to study a certain amount of hours each week; some have goals of where they want to rank in the class and so they study an insane amount of time to reach that goal; some study and study and study just so they feel comfortable with the material and confident for the next test; some put more time in on certain days so that they can put in less time on other days. All of this was hard for me because it took us awhile to figure out a schedule that worked for us. When my husband felt done studying, he wanted to leave school and come home to relax and take a break. He would come home unexpectedly, play outside with the kids, stay for dinner, and then want to leave when he was ready to head back-- except I was pregnant and the kids were all riled up from playing with Daddy, the kitchen was covered in dinner dishes, and bath time was still 2 hours away! I also really disliked when he would come home for a break, head back in for awhile, and then come home shortly after I put the kids to bed. I loved having some one on one time with him, but, man, the days were so long and I could really have used his help putting the boys down instead of him showing up half hour after they were sleeping! It took us awhile, but we eventually found a schedule that worked for us. I completely understood that sometimes he just needed a break from studying and he completely understood how frustrating it was for him to come home each night just after I had put all the kids to bed by myself. Since my husband is a more of a morning person, he started waking up early and studying before school when he was freshest, finishing his homework after school, and then coming home for the evening. On days when felt he needed to study more, he would bathe the kids and put them in pajamas while I cleaned up the kitchen. That way I just needed to read stories before putting the kids to bed. It was a routine that worked for us. There were also a lot of times that he needed to study on the weekends. Figuring out a time on the weekends took us awhile too. We thought we would like getting studying out of the way early in the day, but it ended up working out that I was waking up by myself with the kids 7 days a week and feeling burnt out. If he had a lot of studying he needed to do, he would wake up early and go in. If he just needed to study some, he would head in after breakfast so we could all eat together and have some face time with him. Going in for 4 hours on a weekend morning after breakfast worked better for us than going in for 4 hours before we woke up. It really did take us awhile to figure out what worked best for us.

The other thing that was different for us is that we were more of the exception at power school. A lot of people in his class were newly married or dating. There were a handful of people with kids and most of them had 1, maybe 2, kids. Often, if 2 kids, they were pregnant with the second. I was pregnant with our 4th child and my husband was STA-21. Sometimes I felt awkward making friends and getting together with other couples was a bit challenging at first. When we were invited to our first backyard barbecue with friends of ours that were newly married, we were so excited and nervous. We really wanted it to go well so we would be "accepted" by these couples-- amazingly enough, it went awesome! The kids were so well behaved. We hung out at their house until just after 9 pm-- big for our boys that fall asleep at 8 pm on the dot. My husband and I high fived each other as we walked home that night! Turns out we didnt have anything to worry about. Once the ice was broken, we easily made friends with other couples in the class. However, I have noticed that the other people in his class-- dating, newly married, single-- really have explored the area much more than we have. When he was gone in class all day long, my pregnant self was tired by the time he came home and really looking forward to a quiet, family dinner at home, not battling traffic to try a hole in the wall downtown. When he had time off on the weekends, we eventually took advantage of nearby beaches and found some family restaurants, but often he was catching up on time that he had missed during his busy week-- playing basketball with the boys, working on his woodworking projects, golfing with our oldest, movie nights with me, Costco trips... So, like the guy said in the (Very) Unofficial Submarine Officer Pipeline Rundown, "Being one of the few married guys in my particular class, I didnt get out much. But most of my fellow classmates went out quite a bit."

Since my husband was STA-21, we had just come from him going through college. I thought getting a mechanical engineering degree in 3 years with a family-- having twins during finals week to boot-- would help prepare us for power school. On some level, yes, it did. I know my husbands study style and I know that studying is important for him. However, it was nice when he was in college to have the option for him to study at home. There is no option for him to study at home in power school since all the materials are classified and must be locked up each night at the school house. Power school was very different than college. It was a fast, intense, whirlwind. I was immensely looking forward to his graduation and I know he was too. He was mentally exhausted by the time power school was over and I was well over the power school schedule.

Another question for me was the power school graduation. I didnt know how formal it would be, if I could bring the kids, yadda yadda. It turned out to be just the right degree of formal. I probably could have managed the toddlers there, but I was very grateful that we had a baby-sitter to watch them, especially since I was exceedingly pregnant by that point. We all got to dress nice. They made it very family friendly, inviting people to approach the stage when your sailors class was called so you could take pictures. It was outdoors, so people were wandering the back with their children. They had restrooms and snacks. My husband insisted that he wanted me to go-- I was planning on staying home since I was so pregnant-- and I was glad I listened to him and went. I had worried I would be uncomfortable on the chairs for that long, but the ceremony clipped right along. I got some great pictures of him graduating. I had a snack. I could take our oldest to the restroom. If you are wondering what to wear to the graduation, think Easter Sunday without all the pastels. :)

All in all, I am glad power school is over. It was only 6 months, but the school was exhausting for my husband and for us. There were some bonuses, like if I gave him warning, he could plan on coming home early to watch the kids so I could make an appointment-- things like that.

Now that power school is over, we have prototype and SOBC to look forward to!

How was your experience going through power school as a Navy spouse?

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pregnancy weight loss after delivery | Homeschooling 3 and 4 year old preschool

pregnancy weight loss after delivery

Ive received several emails and Facebook comments lately regarding homeschooling preschool. I wrote a post called "Homeschooling 5-year old preschool." I feel 5-year old preschool was different from his previous years of preschool because he was technically old enough to be a kindergartner, but we decided against doing kindergarten that year. Instead we did another year of preschool with him, just with a more focused direction; he is a child that loves order, structure, and routine.

When considering preschool, there are many different schools of thought. Some really focus on early learning and some focus on play based learning and some on "unschooling." I dont like labels, so I will just describe our thinking when it comes to preschool. I think preschool should be fun. I think it should be play based learning. I think that preschool should focus on character building and how to interact with others. I think it should build a childs confidence and get them excited about learning. Preschool should incorporate the fundamentals of learning-- ABCs, 123s, shapes-- in a fun, play based environment. I referenced this article in my last post on kindergarten, Simple Homeschools "The truth about preschool." That article entirely sums up my thoughts on preschool.

When our oldest was 4-years old we put him in a church preschool program. At that time, our twins were keeping me very busy and I felt like I needed him in something that helped him with his desire for a routine. The program was great. I was surprised, however, at how hard it was to find a preschool program that didnt have a curriculum or focus on subjects. One preschool even had math worksheets-- excessive! We eventually found a program that worked for us-- play based, focusing on character development, interacting with others, and fostering their independence. It was a great program for him and I got a lot of great ideas from it for how I want to homeschool. I really loved how the teachers merged play with learning. When we moved from North Carolina, I was sad to leave the school because I was planning on having him attend their 5-year old preschool program.

One thing that I do not miss about preschool is the preschool schedule. (Yes, I wrote a whole blog post on it, "Preschool schedule.") After we moved last year and were doing 5-year old preschool, we had a lot of hits to our daily routine and by the end of the year we didnt have too much of a daily routine. I had several things on our schedule each week, like a park playdate and storytime, but the middle of the day was often chaotic. Mealtimes slipped into snacktimes; naptimes became movie times on the coach while I napped. The joys of my husbands power school schedule and pregnancy! By the beginning of the summer I was ready to have my body back (being pregnant in the south in the summer is not ideal) and ready for a regular routine. I debated over the summer if I should try to sign the boys up for drop-off camps over the summer, but not knowing if my husband was going to start prototype early in the summer (he didnt) and the unknowns of our routine once baby #4 came prevented me from committing to any day camps. The memory of how inconvenient pick ups and drops were in our day for his 4-year old preschool year is still fresh in my mind. Ive loved that homeschooling happens at our kitchen table, sometimes in pajamas and sometimes over pancakes-- no interruptions to our schedule!

So the big question: what are we doing for preschool this year? What materials are we using for preschool?

To answer the first question, we are doing what we normally do for preschool this year-- life as usual. I didnt have our oldest in a preschool program at 3-years old. I dont plan on putting our toddlers in a preschool program this year. Our big plan for preschool this year is to incorporate their learning in our daily life. I do involve them in some of our homeschool day. If you read the blog post, "Homeschooling kindergarten," I explain that I have all 3 boys say the Pledge of Allegiance, pray for our day, listen to our Bible story, read a poem together and act it out, and do the calendar each day. They are involved in that because that is what Im doing with their older brother for kindergarten. To answer the second question, I have not bought them any special preschool materials and dont use any curriculum with them, not even the Saxon Math book that I used for 5-year old preschool and no special books.

This year with the toddlers we are really focusing on independence. If they want to wear socks, they must put them on. I will help them if they are truly stuck, but they must try first. We problem solve. "If your sock isnt going when you pull it on that way, why not try a different way?" We focus on cleaning up the mess they make. "That was really fun to play with the cars and trucks. Now we get to put them away! How about you start on the cars and then do the trucks?" I help them break down the mess in their mind so they are able to tackle it-- clean up the cars, then clean up the trucks. Once the big toys are put away, they are able to pick up all the smaller action figures quite easily. I involve them in making lunch and baked goods. We work on taking our time and doing things right, "Can you carefully pour the sugar in the mixing bowl?" We work on them following directions, even when it is hard, "Before you go outside, lets get the family room tidied up, please." A big one that has been challenging for all 3 of them is assisting others, which teaches sympathy. "Your brother is sad. Why dont you go ask him what is bothering him and see if you can help?" "I think your brother is having a hard time cleaning up his mess. Why dont you go see what you do can to help him?" Most of the time I hear, "But I didnt make that mess!" Im really surprised at how they have responded to this last one. Im hearing them more and more slow down to help each other out, "Whats wrong, brother?" and I love their sense of pride and camaraderie once the job is done, "I helped him put away his blocks! We were a team!" "He helped me! Thank you, brother!" We put a lot of emphasis on waiting your turn. "Excuse me, your brother wasnt done telling his story. Lets let him finish and then I would love to hear what you have to say." I love Emma Jenners book, Keep Calm and Parent On, for setting expectations on our kids.

The other things we are learning through our everyday life-- shapes, ABCs, and 123s. We read about them in our stories before nap and before bed. We talk about them as we do art, make cookies, go to the park. We talk about colors. We do puzzles. We do all this stuff for fun. We just play and I bring in the learning, drawing their attention to something they are naturally connecting. "My blanket is the same color as a fire truck." Well, what color is the fire truck?

I mentioned in my blog post "Homeschooling kindergarten" that later this year I will have them start memorizing memory verses. This is something that we have been doing with our oldest since he was 3-years old. We used the verses he was learning at AWANAS, which we have not been able to fit into our schedule last year or this year, and discussed them throughout the day. I love memorizing Bible verses with the kids because I feel that it teaches lots of things. We write the verse down and will point to it as we say it-- it teaches words have meaning. When they see the memory verse card, they often start recognizing letters, "Thats an A, Momma!" They see the letters outside of their alphabet books and puzzles and start looking for them everywhere, "Momma, I see another A!" I also love that it helps them learn to retain things I teach them. The other thing about memory verses is that choosing key verses helps teach them things about their own behavior and Gods character. We learn to forgive because God forgives. We learn to examine our own actions, was I being fair to my brother? We learn to say Im sorry without prompting from a parent. Right now we talk about their older brothers memory verses and we use various phrases when dealing with conflict with each other, "Was that a kind thing to do to your brother? Do you think that made him feel happy or sad?" "How do you think we could show your dad we love him when he comes home?"

Next year our toddlers will do another year of preschool. They will be 4-years old at the beginning of the year and turn 5-years old during the year. I will probably start some of the methods that I used doing 5-year old preschool with their older brother. We will do letters of the week or colors of the week. Preschoolers love show and tell. During Red Week, Ill have them show and tell us about something red. During "A" week, Ill have them show and tell us about something that starts with an A. Ill probably use our Saxon Math K book again. Ive liked Saxon Math because the scripts are there to help explain something if you want them. I also like that it completely explains a certain activity, like introducing them to money or manipulating linking cubes or using counting bears. I like the Math K book because it was a great resource for me to find ideas for an activity if I needed help coming up with some sort of lesson for the day. I could open up Saxon Math K, read a lesson that involved counting bears, pull out the counting bears and say, "Okay, lets play with these for awhile." Then I could guide the play in a way that taught the lesson. That is how I most often used the book-- getting ideas, reading the scripts, and then applying it in a way that fit our preschool technique.

I really like unit studies for preschool. One unit study we did last year was on water. We just talked a lot about water. What happens if we get water really hot? What happens if we get water really cold? What letters are in the word water? What makes letter makes a "whu-" sound? Where do we find water? What animals live in water? Lets read books that have water in them. What movies have water in it? What do we call water that comes from the sky? What is water good for? On and on and on... So many fun experiments and lessons you can do in a unit study. Library trips. Movies. Books. Unit studies are great too because it really lets the preschoolers imagination run wild and lets them ask questions and find answers. (Unit studies are also a great way to include kids of different ages!)

How do you keep preschool fun?

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pregnancy weight loss success stories | Life still goes on

pregnancy weight loss success stories

Our toddler old was diagnosed with reactive airways disease last spring and we recently wrote an action plan for him with our pediatrician. Looking online, the blogs and medical sites use the acronym RAD (Reactive Airway Disease). There is a lot of conflicting information out there regarding whether or not a toddler can be definitely told he has asthma. Medscape Reference states that a child needs to be "at least 5 years of age" before he can diagnosed with asthma in their December 2011 article "Pediatric Reactive Airway Disease." Expert Advice in the "Asthma: Difference Between it and RAD" Q&A, February 2002, says the diagnosis cant be made in "children under two years of age." Both pediatricians we saw as well as our CPNP and asthma/allergy specialist told us that O has reactive airways with a high probability of it later being diagnosed as asthma, considering our family history and Os personal medical history. While he does not have a diagnosis of asthma, we are proceeding as such because of his own medical history.

Weve started using new words around the home. Instead of saying, "Hes really laboring to breathe," we say, "Hes having heavy retractions." We already used wheezing, but now we talk about crackling lungs instead of saying, "Hes catching when he breathes." Flare-ups, yellow zone, nebulizer, breathing treatment... Our preschooler asks how O is doing and our non-asthmatic toddler watches the administration of breathing treatments to see if hes missing anything.

Last night I sat on the floor of the living room with my husband, showing him how to work the nebulizer and how to give a breathing treatment. We talked about Os medications and what they were for: Pulmicort, Albuterol, Oprapred, as well as his short-term antibiotic. We used the word "corticosteroid" several times today. I myself take a corticosteroid twice a day, Flovent, and have Albuterol inhalers tucked in key places around the house (though I havent had to use it in awhile, knock on wood). However, I am comfortable telling my doctor that I need a refill on my bronchodilator. It seems like a whole different ballgame having my son need a bronchodilator.

Corticosteroids are used for asthma management. This is what keeps your lungs "in shape," and is often referred to as a maintenance medication. No matter what "zone" he is in (check out my blog "Reactive airways"), he will take the Pulmicort twice a day. An article in Doctors Guide titled "FDA Approves Pulmicort Nebulized Corticosteroid (Budesonide) For Asthmatic Children" says that use of "inhaled corticosteroids has allowed physicians the ability to target inflamed airways." In "Managing Your Childs Asthma" published by the Childrens Hospital of St. Louis, it states:

Sometimes, flare-ups do occur even when asthma is controlled with the best possible means. At these times, your physician may prescribe Prednisone or Orapred, oral steroids used to reduce the inflammation in the airways and help in the resolution of the asthma flare-up. These oral medications are given for 5-7 days.  

O has an Orapred prescription for those flare-ups." I really like this article from the Childrens Hospital of St. Louis, so Im going to quote them again for the bronchodilator, Albuterol, or "rescue medication:"

The most commonly used rescue medication is Albuterol, which relaxes the contracted muscles surrounding the airways and helps move air through the airways. Use this when your child is having an asthma attack or when you expect an asthma exacerbation...

With all of these medications and things to watch and keep in mind, having an Asthma Management Plan is key. This is something that we wrote with our pediatrician. Again with the Childrens Hospital of St. Louis article, "An asthma action plan will help you manage your child’s asthma on a daily basis as well as serving as a guide for a) what to do if an asthma attack occurs and b) when to go to the ER for help."

We spent awhile today brainstorming what we are going to do when leaving the boys with our childcare-- drop-in childcare and with our baby-sitters. Our big dilemma is that our twins are identical. We wouldnt want our regular baby-sitter giving C Pulmicort when it is O who needs it, or for O to go unmonitored at drop-in childcare because he was confused with his brother or lost in the crowd. Or what about at the church nursery where there seems to be a new volunteer every week? I did some online research as well as posted on some twin groups. In all the websites I looked at, there seemed to be three basic options of bracelets: stainless steel small classic bracelet from American Medical ID, childrens adjustable alert fashion bracelets from Colonial Medical Assisted Devices, and a 3-pack of toddler sized asthma alert medical ID rubber bracelets from E-Bay. What kind of bracelet works best for a 17-month old? I dont think he would keep a Velcro bracelet or the child-size rubber bracelets on. Im also concerned about the information on the engraved medical ID. If we engrave Pulmicort and it gets changed, we would need a new medical ID... but dont we want to list his medications? Ugh. I dont know. I did get some great tips from the twin groups, such as zipper pulls and shoe charms (although Im lazy and his shoes are Velcro... haha!). My husband had a great idea this afternoon. You know those clear ID badge holders? He suggested I make a chart on the computer, print it out, and cut it out to fit an ID badge holder. I could have Os information visible on one side and print the medical symbol large for the other side. These would be much more affordable to make, so I could clip one on his diaper bag, hang it one on the stroller, and even attach one to Os person. This addresses all my concerns, making sure they would have all Os information in an emergency and preventing my toddlers from getting mixed-up. (Just one of a million reasons why I love this man!)

We did well today. O had a rough nap and slept fitfully. He woke up wheezing and out of breath. We watched him for a little while, "Does he need Albuterol? Is this just his cold working its way out? No, hes really wheezing... but hes smiling..." Every medical professional we have encountered has remarked on what a sweet boy O is. He always has a smile. He is very obedient. It makes it easy to treat him, but difficult to assess where hes really at. Even with extremely low oxygen levels in the PICU last February, he had smiles for the staff. We ended up giving him an Albuterol treatment this afternoon, which took care of the wheezing. I even left my husband home alone with the boys while I went to the movies with girlfriends. He gave O his Pulmicort and I tried not to think about him the whole time I was out of the house. It was good to get out for a bit.

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weight loss during early pregnancy symptoms | Mom to all boys

weight loss during early pregnancy symptoms

Ive refrained from writing a post about what it is like being a mom to boys, but I suppose with our fourth boy on the way, it is long overdue. I love being the mother to my children and I love my children with all my heart. Right now, I view them as my children. Yes, I call them "boys" when I am addressing them or talking about them, "Boys, we need to take turns," "Boys, you did a great job following instructions at the doctors office," "Boys, it is time to go!" "I was out today with our boys..." But I do not-- ever-- use it to corner them into a gender role. "Son, you need to toughen up," "Son, you need to stop crying like a girl," or, my absolute least favorite expression ever, "Boys will be boys."

Why does it bother me so much hearing "boys will be boys?" Because, in my experience, people do not use that expression in regards to positive behavior demonstrated by my children. When one of our toddlers steals a toy from the other toddler and he lashes out in anger, ending up with both toddlers hanging on to either end of a toy and screaming, I hear, "Oh, boys will be boys!"

When I am out shopping at Target and our children throw a fit wanting to go down the Matchbox car aisle, screaming over some toy they recently saw advertised on television, I hear, "Boys will be boys!" chuckled by some stranger walking by.

When one of our children dressed head to toe in a pirate outfit picks up a stick that he then labels a sword and begins hitting his brother with it, I hear, "Boys will be boys!"

It makes me mad. We have had many playdates where little girls wrestled for a toy with one of our boys. Ive seen many little girls throwing fits in the toy department at Target. Our boys have been hit, kicked, and bitten on many playdates with little girls (and before any one says biting is only done by girls, our oldest was attacked by a male preschooler dubbed a "biter" at our drop-in childcare and weve had many biting incidents between all of our boys).

Im not in denial that little boys and little girls develop differently-- mentally or physically. Im not saying they dont have different interests. Our little boys all have baby dolls and babies that they take care of but these baby dolls often become equipped with super powers or become weapons to hit each  other with. One of our toddlers has a baby dinosaur that has always remained a baby-- he gets very upset if you are rough with his baby dinosaur-- but if you pet it, he will make it bite you and roar a fierce roar. Even that baby has a wild streak. Maybe little girls play this way. I dont know, having never raised little girls, but I remember being a little girl and remember all the games we used to play with our baby dolls. Some games were wild and crazy, some were sweet and maternal. I feel our boys play similarly. I hear them in there feeding and napping baby dolls. I hear their baby dolls fighting super villains. It all depends on the game they are playing.

There are things that frustrate me when shopping at big box stores being a mom of boys. It is really hard to find a gender neutral doll stroller or baby doll carrier. All our boys have asked for one at one point or another and I cant bring myself to buy the hot pink doll strollers. Why do all the doll strollers have to scream "THIS IS FOR A GIRL"? Our oldest is old enough to know that these types of toys were marketed for girls. Play kitchens are another thing that are hard to get gender neutral. There are a lot of pink play kitchens out there (play kitchens at ToysRUs). You can find several online, but, in stores, the gender neutral kitchens tend to cost more than the pink ones every store carries. (We ended up buying the Fisher Price Servin Surprises Kitchen and Table and have loved it.) Funny since being a chef is such a male dominated profession... Our boys love Doc McStuffins. Have you looked at her retail products (Doc McStuffins at the Disney Store)? I get shes targeted towards little girls pursuing their dreams and not being restrained in another male dominated field, but it is a lot easier, again, to buy pink doctors kits than gender neutral or boy doctors kits (doctors kits at ToysRUs). I wish I could buy these things more easily and so it would be less of a statement. No one questions our Fisher Price kitchen, but they feel Im making radical parenting decisions when they see our toddler carrying around his "Disney book," a Disney princess notepad he insists on bringing everywhere and "reading."

Even more offensive to me are the "funny" t-shirts geared towards little boys. I saw a blue onesie at a Party City that said, "Hide your daughters" or "Lock up your daughters." Really? Thats appropriate for an infant? We even own several well-meaning boys shirts, "Tough like Dad" or the Osh Kosh graphic t-shirts. Not saying those shirts are bad, but they further promote the gender stereotype that because you are a boy you are automatically this rough and tumble dirt magnet.

I dont believe in the extreme, like keeping a childs gender hidden (read about the Canadian couple who did just that). Ive also heard of families that believe in allowing their children to choose any clothes and toys they like. For instance, taking their son shopping and allowing him to wander the girls and boys department picking out things he likes, regardless of the gender it is marketed for. Our boys threw a huge fit when we bought them blue boat shoes instead of the pink sequined boat shoes. While I am not going to buy our two-year old sons pink sequined boat shoes based on their whim, I also dont believe gender shaming is the correct way to explain my reasoning, such as, "You are a boy. You dont wear pink GIRL shoes!" We simply told them we had picked out which shoes we were buying. And, no, we havent bought our boys Barbie dolls or anything along those lines, though we have bought them boy Manhattan Toy Baby Stella Dolls.

We have had many playdates with many boys and girls. I have heard from many mothers of girls, "Your boys are so well-behaved! We have playdates with other boys and they spend the whole time running and hitting." Im not saying our boys dont run and hit and the mothers of girls arent saying their girls dont ever run and hit, but-- Ive seen it too-- many mothers of boys dont discourage this behavior. Why is it acceptable for your children to play tag or sword fight in someone elses home? Why is it acceptable for your children to wrestle in someone elses living room? Weve had little girls sprint into our house and start jumping on our couch for their mothers to come in and tell them they needed to get down. Weve had little boys sprint into our house and start jumping on our couch for their mothers to shrug and say, "Boys will be boys!" My couch doesnt distinguish between a little girl or a little boy jumping across it wearing shoes. It bothers me, from the stand point of a grown woman living in this male dominated world, that even from the beginning we as women are allowing our boys a pass on good behavior due to their gender. "Dont worry about being polite in someone elses home. You are a boy and can behave how you feel in the moment."

It makes me cringe when people tell me, "You are lucky you are only going to have boys. You wont have to go through [x, y, and z of female behavior]." Good Lord, if my parents ever told me those words while I was growing up, who would I be today? Would I feel that I have the freedom to make choices that suit our family? Would I have the confidence to put my career goals on hold for the time being to support my husband at this point in his career? Would I have the patience to spend these years working in our home, homeschooling our boys and raising them to be young men after Gods heart? Would I be able to hold my own at dinner parties when I hear educated women pursuing their careers brush me off when they find out Im a stay-at-home mother? Would I know in my heart the importance of continuing my education as a I balance family life and my own dreams? Would I continue to write day after day, read as often as I do, discuss my own hopes and dreams with my children*, their daddys hopes and dreams, and encourage them to discuss and pursue their own hopes and dreams? Would I believe-- really and truly-- that one person can make a difference in this world? I dont know. Thankfully my parents never said those things to me and my sisters. They never made us feel lesser as females. They never made us feel like we couldnt or shouldnt or will never. They never made us feel there is one path we must walk down. They encouraged our individuality. We all rebelled in our own ways and they stuck by us throughout and encouraged us to learn from our mistakes, to discuss what we learned, to embrace ourselves for who we are as individuals-- not for gender stereotypes.

(*Note: I discuss my hopes and dreams with my husband and he with me. We feel it is also important for our children to see their parents pursuing their goals and supporting each other in that.)

And, yes, I believe men grow up and generally interact differently with their parents than women do, especially in regards to the mother/daughter relationship. Every day as I parent my children I understand more and more what it was like for my mother raising the four of us. Every day I am more and more thankful for her love, sacrifice, patience, and the lessons and morals she instilled in us. I find myself often looking back to my own childhood for guidance when faced with a difficult parenting dilemma. Im quick to tell my children Im sorry. Im quick to hug them when they have made a mistake and I listen when they explain to me what they did wrong and the lessons they feel they learned from that mistake. I make the time to listen to them. I am joyful in my relationship with them. Some days are never ending and emotionally/physically exhausting, but I put in the hard work with my eye on the end goal: the example given to me from my own parents. I see the people my parents raised and want to walk down that road, sometimes taking the lessons I learned from them and applying them in a way that works better for our own family situation. And I do mourn that I will never have the relationship that I have with my own mother (read "Four boys"), but I know that one day my sons will have spouses or partners that will become family to us, just as my husband and my brother-in-law have become family to us. (I could have that mother/daughter relationship with my daughter-in-law!)

We want our boys to have the confidence to become the men that God desires them to be. We want our boys to have the self-assurance to take the hard road, the less traveled road, the road that is right for them. We want our boys to know that their parents support them 100%, no matter what, that wherever life takes them we are at home with arms wide open. We want our boys to grow up with dreams, reachable and unreachable, and a list of goals they are constantly adding to. We want them to be passionate about life and sure of what they believe in. We want them to grow up with a strong support system at home, from their parents and from their siblings. We want them to feel Gods presence in their lives. We want them to know that their parents are not perfect, but constantly humbling themselves before God to be the parents he wants us to be to each of our children, striving for what is best for our children-- not the easiest or the most popular, and showing them love every day in all things. Right now our boys are young. Our oldest is 5 and a half years old. Our twin toddlers are going to be 3 in a few short weeks. Our fourth is due early this summer. I know our focus on parenting is much different than a parent of even middle-schoolers; Im sure our priorities will shift as they grow, becoming adolescent boys. Our focus right now is about our letting our children be children. We want to give them the space and time to be bored and explore their creativity. We want to nurture creative play and pretend play. We want them to be active. We want to cheer for them (read "Marthas and Marys"). We want them to learn manners and how to function in society.

I love Rage Against the Minivans recent post, "I dont want to #banbossy. But I will #affirmassertive." To her post I say yes, yes, yes! As a woman, I feel it is important for our boys to grow up learning to respect all people for who they are as individuals and not treating someone differently based on their gender, just as we dont treat anyone differently based on their race. I hear a lot of words thrown around at infants, toddlers, and preschoolers based solely on their gender (by women, no less!), "We were late because Miss Priss couldnt find the perfect pair of shoes and threw a diva fit. The female hormones start early! You are lucky to have all boys." "Girls and boys are so different; you dont even know. He was such a good baby. You are lucky to have all boys because shes been demanding since she was a newborn." "She is such a little momma, always wanting to play with the new baby, but he doesnt even notice the baby. Hes too busy being all boy." I know these mommas dont mean anything hurtful by these comments, but our boys have ears (and their boys have ears). To the moms with two children, a girl and a boy, I would like to say that all three of our boys have different personalities and have been easier/harder than each other at various points (teething, nap schedule, bathtime, feeding, etc), and all of them are the same gender. Our boys are sensitive and assertive in various areas; they all have different strengths and weaknesses. One will cry when he feels embarrassed or shy. One will cry (and cry and cry and cry) if he sees a bruise or a single drop of blood anywhere on his body. One throws a fit if his hands or clothes are dirty. One can play outside for hours. One can cuddle with you for hours. One wants to hold your hand if he feels scared. One wants to hold his brothers hand if he feels scared. One will change his clothes 3 or 4 times a day, putting on a new outfit for each activity he is doing. One will wear the same outfit day after day unless we make him change. One loves rainboots and wears them with everything. One loves all shoes and tries raiding my closet, his dads closet, and both his brothers closets for shoes. One hates bathing. One loves bathing. One only wants to take showers. They are different. They are different people with different tastes. They may all like something. They may all dislike something. But it is not just because they are boys. And we would really like for our boys to have interactions with other children who are treated as individuals as well, not hear how their little friend is bossy because she is a girl or that it is okay to throw sand in someones face because he is a boy.

So if you have a friend who is pregnant with her second boy or fourth boy, tell her, "Congratulations!" (and maybe read this blog post by Scary Mommy, "Things Not to Say to a Mom Expecting Another Boy"). When you have a playdate with a mom of all boys, dont say "Boys will be boys" or "He is all boy, isnt he?" Tell her, "It is fun getting our kids together!" Dont talk down your little girls to our little boys or excuse our boys behavior with their gender. If you have a house rule that you have playdates follow, you can gently tell the mom, "Would you mind asking them not to sword fight in here? They could take that in the backyard or playroom though!"

Maybe Im overzealous on this subject. I dont want our twins defined by their birth either (read "Identical brothers") and I love when all moms support each other, whether it is a mom of one or a mom of multiples (read "We are moms"). As the mother to these boys-- these three, almost four, people-- that God has given my husband and I, I am confident we are doing what is best for us, which, really is what parenting is all about.

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ucla pregnancy weight loss program | Im Baaaaaack!

ucla pregnancy weight loss program

Well hello there! It seems so so long since I last sat down at my computer and actually blogged! We returned from our amazing American road trip last week and I think I have just about got back into the swing of things and managed to climb down from the mountain of washing and ironing (though I have a strong suspicion that someone must have added their clothes to our suitcases!) 

So, Im back and Im currently juggling a grumpy toddler (shes just woke up from her nap), making a chilli for tea and picking up thrown Peppa Pig toy ice-creams.  Its all good fun.  But, I just wanted to quickly let you know of some exciting posts I have coming up.  Obviously, lets start with my travel posts.  We visited so many amazing places in America and I want to share our travels in New York, San Francisco, Monterey, Santa Barbara and San Diego. We travelled with our nearly three year old (!) daughter.  I cant wait to share our adventures with you and I hope if anyone is planning on travelling to any of those places I will be able to share some tips and recommendations with you.

Whilst the holiday was amazing, it wasnt all smiles and ice-creams.  I have a post that tells a few of the behind the scenes dramas that went on and what you didnt see on my Twitter or Instagram feed.  It includes me crying outside of a supermarket, but more of that little tale in the upcoming post! 

I also did a spot of beauty shopping (American drug stores are amazing for make-up), and Ive also got some brilliant UK fashion finds too.  

So please be sure to pop back for lots of exciting content, drama, tears and amazing adventures. 

Thanks for reading, 

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